After a very emotional couple of days I needed to blow off some steam and decided to write a little something sarcastic. Please don’t take this as an endorsement of anything or support for any side of any issues. It was simply written to help me blow off some steam.
Call to Arms
After reviewing all the news clips online about recent violence in the USA, Europe, and the rest of the world I decided we need to call out to our representatives for quick and effective computer laws.
Sure, a computer sitting there all by itself, unplugged looks pretty harmless but let some fiend plug it in and boot it up and you have a weapon of mass destruction sitting on your child’s desk.
You say, “How can that be? It is just a box of electronic parts.” Connect it to the internet and look out. Watch as it unleashes volumes of pornography into your home. See how your credit card statement grows exponentially as your computer links up with Amazon.
Take a last look at your kids as they disappear into online gaming forever. Don’t feel you are safe because they are in the basement now rather than out on the corner. They will sit there in the dark and never, ever leave. You see the Morlocks they have become only when hunger drives them to the surface to feed.
This is only the traditional web. I watched Mr. Robot so I know all about the Dark Web now and know how dangerous that is. Protect my kids from that horror.
I call upon my elected representatives to draw up legislation limiting our computers to safe and respectable level of performance. Limit our access to the internets. This walking down the street with your head buried in your phone while you tweet is downright dangerous.
Back in my day when the internets were invented the top computers had 386 Intel Processors with a 200-megabyte hard drive. If you needed more storage you had your choice of two sizes of floppy disc. If your computer had 8 megabytes of RAM you could run a business on it.
It was more than enough to play your video games. More than enough to write your letters and more than enough to go online if you had a dial-up modem. This computer ensured you had free time to look up and speak to your family while you downloaded something online.
Does anyone really need dual state of the art graphics cards? Does anyone understand how fast computers are anymore? I don’t.
Back in 1983, our computers had the DOS installed on them. It forced you to learn how dangerous they really were. Once you thought you knew what you were doing and got cocky your system would crash and you would lose everything. It kept you humble. Nowadays anyone can sit down at one and run amok. It’s just not safe. At least regulate and register these machines of death.
I call for a maximum of a 386 Pentium machine with 8megs of RAM and no more. A dial-up hard drive and no free wi-fi at coffee shops. Who do they think they are giving it away for free like that?